Friday, May 09, 2008

Legs and Locksmiths

I awoke to screaming this morning. Not sad, come-get-me-out-of-my-crib, whiny screaming but full blown bloody murder screams. This used to happen nearly every morning, back when Caden was teething, but not anymore. All three kids wake up happy, talking to each other until I come in to get them up. So, I quickly filled their sippy's with milk, and headed into their bedroom to see what was going on. As I opened the door and turned on the light, I noticed Caden was on his back with his right leg through the bars of the crib. I shushed him, told him Mama was there, that he would be fine, and tried to push his leg back through the bars. It was stuck, right above his knee, and I couldn't get it to go back through. I started to panic around this point in the chaos, he wouldn't stop screaming, and I was afraid he'd re-broken his leg or something, seeing as how when I pushed on his leg it made his scream harder.

I had NO IDEA what to do. I grabbed the phone, called Carl, asked if we had a hand saw that I could cut the crib bar with. He replied that no, we did not, and what on earth was I going to saw? I practically screamed the story out to him, while frantically trying to figure out what to do. I was crying, too, by this point and envisioning a call to the police. Carl said he'd be here as soon as he could, but he works about a half hour away and based on Caden's screams, I was sure death or something worse was imminent so I decided to take care of it myself. With a serrated kitchen knife. I sawed at the bar as best I could, and when I realized I couldn't get all the way through, I kicked it. Yes, I am just that stupid. The bar flew off, bounced off of Caden's cheek and hit the wall. As it bounced off his cheek, he screamed harder and louder, which made me cry harder as well as feel like I was having a heart attack. Although, as he saw his crib bar heading at his eyes I'm sure he probably had one too.

Clearly, I do not respond well under pressure. What kind of demented individual KICKS a bar at their child's face? Well, me, apparently.

Thank God I didn't gouge his eye right out of his head. He has a bruise on his face, which I'll show you later, but other than that he's fine. Well, physically. Emotionally, he may need therapy after this day.

After this, we snuggled in the recliner until Carl got home to check his leg out. He decided it was fine, then went to fix Caden's crib. It's duck-taped, by the way. I should show you that, too.

We have physical therapy at 11:00 on Friday's, so after breakfast and dressing everyone, it was time to go. Carl took Caden out to the Suburban while he fixed their DVD player, and then put him in the car. It was running. Also, it was locked.

Yup, now my son was locked in a running car. A car to which we oh-so-smartly only have one set of keys.

As I'm calling a locksmith, Carl is trying to get Caden to push the window button with his foot. He does this every once in a while, but mostly by accident. He can't reach it with his hand, hence the foot. However, he was just staring at his dad as if his body had been invaded by an extraterrestrial, because WHY COULD HE NOT JUST OPEN THE DOOR LIKE USUAL?

The locksmith was so friendly and understanding, but since Lakeside has nothing, we had to call one in Kalispell. After 10 minutes or so, Carl came running in, said Caden had rolled the window down a little bit, and he had then stuck some stick or something in to roll it down the rest of the way. So now that the doors were unlocked and the child free, we phoned the locksmith again to say that we didn't need them to come afterall. We offered to pay for their gas, since they had to be nearly here, but they said that if a child is stuck in a car their service is free. Seriously, this was the bright point in our day.

Everything has since calmed down, we actually even made it to therapy on time. Crazy, huh? I'll post some pictures later to further share this ridiculous situation.

At least our therapist's seem to trust us, and didn't turn us in. That would've added an element that was missing from our lives!


cv said...

I hate those horrible snowball event days.

We met our next door neighbor in CT when we left the house one morning to see her and her 3 children peering into the storm sewer to see if they could see the car keys that the baby had dropped down there.

She was on her way to work, and the kids were all on their way to school, sitter, etc. Single mom, lots of stress.

No second set of keys there either.

We have a fire box with all that kind of 'whoops' stuff in it.
We'll probably lose it.

I'm glad everything is ok.

Karli said...

Hi Kelli,
I totally don't remember that story, but they probably had mites. I don't remember them ever having lice, and we never had it as kids, either, thank-goodness! I don't remember how they died. That's so sad! I'm glad you got to hold them!

I'm so sorry about your horrible day! Hang in there!

Sandra said...

You poor thing. Days like this can make you wonder if you have any sanity left. I'm glad you all survived.

Kristen said...

How awful! Glad you all survived as well!

aola said...

OH MY GOD! What a day... but it does make for wonderful blog fodder and I am sorry I laughed so hard.

Kristen said...

By the way, happy mother's day Kelli!

McMom said...

What a day!!! Those days come with the Mommy territory! LOL!


Becky said...

Oh, Kelli, this made me giggle. Great big sympathy giggles. If I was there, I would have totally come over. We have sooo done this. The saddest thing is we didn't even have the excuse of Sam when things like this happened. Nate once busted out the back window of his running truck because the door was locked. Good times.
Sometimes it seems like life conspires to make everything difficult.
I'm sure Caden won't need therapy, but I bet he's going to have a great sense of humor.

Kelli said...

To be honest, it makes me laugh too. It is all just too ridiculous to not!

Caden is completely fine, btw, and his face actually looks fine too. :)